All of us have it – this human ego, especially myself.
What is preventing our Ascension, our leaving the Matrix, the maya…our time here on earth, this hologram, this virtual prison in which we are literally trapped all the time, knowing we live in illusion but still ‘suffering’ through it. Why?
If we realy were divine beings and our spirit was one then why is it that this spirit is seen or perceived as a human spirit. Look at the images of all the Ascended masters, all human beings…most of them pictured as mythological angels with human bodies and bird wings, we borrow those wings don’t we from other animals, and pretend that we can also fly, one day, without fuel and not just in dreams within dremas (I wanted to write deams but it came our as dramas, hence dremas) but in this dream itself, this dream we woke up in today, this morning in our bedrooms.
Those images we see of heroes, of the past, or myths and legends, of magically perfect human beings, our aspiration to be at the center of the universe, to say we are one with the father God, the mother Goddess, one with all there is, the alpha, the Omega, since childhood we are programmed to think and respect all those spiritual philosophies of human ascension. And seeing ascended masters as human beings who are perfect, pure presence, divine and radiant, calm and loving, unconditional – but human.
What if that was keeping us from our Ascension, our bondage to our human and superhuman forms. Our superheroes and ascended self as devatas, devas, angels with wings in human bodies. So personifying ourselves as angels, we fail to understand who we actually are. And here is the hard truth. Inspite of all our ego and vanity as human beings, regardless of how popular we become in spirituality, how positive our auras glow and how we shine in our beauty and bliss, of all our high vibrations and chakra raising frequencies of light, sound and bliss, what if we are not that great, what if we are not that superior to rest of creation, what if we are not any kind of divine soul or spirits but fallen ones – demons. Yes even demons have chakras, even they have higher self, even they are magical, eloquent, beautiful, with excellent personalities, fine taste, charm, charisma and radiant auras.
In my dreams I once saw a very popular human master, I had to run really fast as it was not a dream but a very lucid phenomena, where I ran at superspeed and went down in a subway, down into earth, in an underworld, where a lot of humans lived and there I saw one of the ascended masters, a very popular guru and he was communicating telepathically with me as most spirits do guiding me to read about ceremonial magick in an astral library where I went to get a book. It was not a place I felt to be divine at all and the librarian said I am not supposed to be here and I went back to earth. I wondered if these are such amazing ascended masters and powerful spiritual men with so many decades of meditation, such minimal, simple lives, such higher powers, brilliant intellect and wonderful books, how can it be they are in underground. In my reading of ceremonial magick, I was impressed, the Wiccan magick and rituals take much from it, but in all these rituals it still feels hollow as if we are still working with energy around us, the hologram. Those chants and sermons, speeches and signs, kaballah, numerology, astrology, and tarot, have been what I have learnt all my life since childhood in my rigid fascination with the occult. Knowledge.
So I ask myself what if our visualisation of ourselves as humans, as all of us ascending as human beings in flawed. What if our biggest barrier to ascension is our ego, our fascination with spiritual heights and spiritual glory and power, and our interest in rising up like angels in human form through our magical paths, our religions, our spiritual traditions, our concrete and stone circles and churches, temples and architectures that instill pride – our ego based artificial titles and thrones of power.
Does any other animal have any of those spiritual traditions, those spiritual cravings of rising and uniting with a deity, a higher self? No they are like children. Very simple, very pure. They do not have a mind like we do as humans. But what is our mind? is it something that makes us superior to those other animals, or plants. Just because we have a good mind to manipulate energy, to use energy at our will, to take energy from earth, to harness, to consume energy, to play with energy, to make things, houses, jobs, money…to visualise to manifest – does that make us superior to the rest of the other species? Or does that simply make us better demons, more conscious demons, more awakened demons, more powerful demons.
What if humans are not going for ascension at all but going to learn lessons, lessons that we cannot learn until we fall. What if we are here in this simulation or matrix for a reason, to learn some lessons, to bring our big egos down. To learn to stop projecting this ‘aura’ around us, one of power, one of self-love focused on selfies and hedonism, where we look so divine, one of our face surrounded with a halo around it, radiating peaceful and positive vibrations, with beautiful bodies, and for one second, realize the depths to which we have fallen in our human life. For as monkeys and apes we probably were a little more in alignment with nature. Maybe we can return to that at our very best attempt to not destroy our planet any longer.
I see myself and I see all humans and I see us all having the same basic nature, we all eat, go to the toilet, we consume nature, we have bodies, that keeps us humble, that keeps us down in the realisation that we are not superior and not ascended in any way but still bound to the rules and regulations of the matrix, the laws of physicality. However when we additionally see the impact we are having on the planet as a civilisation, by even using this computer, I know there is suffering in it, not mine – but of others, there are so many animals killed for it, in the LCD screen itself of our mobiles, tablets, laptops, the gelatin in the seat of the bicycle I purchased second hand, the leather in our car seats, the paint we use, the paper in the books and tarot cards made of cut trees ….we know it, we do not want it…we want to be less harmful and save the world, but the fact is we have fallen so very deep, so very down, so low in frequency as a civilisation, that even saying this fact out loud, makes other humans angry.
We want to hear uplifting things, about humans, that we are doing so much to save the world, to heal the world, to make it a better place, to realize our faults and make a difference. This ‘so much that we do’ that we are ‘trying’, is our ego talking. We want to make a very big deal about ourselves as humans and glorify the work we do. But look at us, fallen monkeys, fallen apes we are, wearing clothes unlike the chimpanzees who resemble us. This is who we are.
So if we meditate it should be to lower our ego, to be down to earth, to realize who we are really. Nothing great, nothing larger than life, nothing to outshine other species on the planet, not with any kind of bird wings around us, simply apes, simply human – homo sapiens and monkeys gone all wrong, evolving negatively in our science and spirituality that is ego centric. And the truth is we are in a simulation and learning our lessons, some very harsh ones. With this realisation of who we are and where we are, maybe just a bit of ascension may be possible, if we can stop being demons first, a bit less negative than the rogue monkeys and destructive apes that we have become.
If our human and non-human superiority complex is our fall, then maybe we can rise again through humility, through consciousness and awareness that we are not in any way greater than any other being on this planet. May our meditation make us humble instead of imagining we are vessels of compassion spreading love to the universe and healing the universe with flowers of light emerging from our auras and blessing the world with our inner light, may we simply try to not be evil first or to be less evil if possible.
This heart opening does not happen easily, we will see our egoes and we will resist it, claiming our sovergneity, our free will, our place in a heavenly realm that our ancestors and ascended visualisations have promised is awaiting us when we leave the planet to be united with the higher self. First let us unite with the lower self, the planet and its humble species that exist here before we embrace our star families and the alien worlds that we aspire to reach out to in our scientific-spiritual ‘pseudo’ quests and adventures our our mind. Afterall why is it that no aliens are there coming in spaceships to planet earth if there are billions of planets around us – obviously because we are in a simulation, it is not real, it is a mirage and a dreamworld, infinity, this space-time continuum, universe and we are learing some very hard truths living in the holgram of earth-shan with our insectoid and reptilian relatives who are human in body all around us keeping us highly involved within this program.
Our ascension is not happening from our computer screens by semi-intellectual pondering over the mysteries of the universe and learning more and more complex terms and jargons from our scientific-spiritual circles, lineages, masters and guides, traditions, cultures and scriptures full of tonnes of information. Because all this is merely information – mind, matrix, not the heart. Our heart is where ascension happens, and it opens because we are not visualising any greatness in our aura, any colourful vibrations, simply seeing ourselves as who we really are, as creatures on earth, no greater than any other. Because first we need to see who we are in the ordinary unconscious day to day existence we are trapped in at the mundane level, as these ape men and women wearing clothes, looking good, imagining bird wings growing from our shoulders and flying into the skies of heaven, as those apes meditating and uniting with light, turning into light beings, merging with and meandering within the hologram around us, the universe, infinity – fluttering like fairies on earth in the cycles of spring, summer, autumn winter and global warming, healing the planet, flying in the astral skies of space and infinity, light and free, watching the galaxies appear and disappear, in trancendental meditations having those experiences that great yogis talk about after years and decades of meditation – the matrix showing us what it is. And opening our eyes after our flights of fancy and realising we are still here. Home?